How we know what is in the heart

God brings us to the end of our strength, to the end of our joy, to the end of our resources, to the end of self.

Why?

To know what is in our heart. He pours us out until we are empty, until he reaches the dregs, the rotting detritus left at the bottom that should have been sieved long ago (Deut 8:1-5). A thing is not known to be in your heart until it comes out through the mouth or the hands, for the heart is hidden and deceitful (Jer 17:9); it must be drawn out by circumstance so that it can be seen. You need to see yourself in the mirror of this trial so you are confronted by your own heart. How else can we be disciples unless we are disciplined? God is making us his sons, we are not just sons by birth but by upbringing as well and what son is not disciplined. We are apt to forget that in the midst of the trial our feet did not swell and our clothes did not wear out. (v4)

We are brought into the desert to eat the manna from heaven, to depend entirely upon his word, to know that every blessing is from His hand and not ours, to make you dependent upon him - not your strength, your wits, your skill, your ingenuity: these things come from a man's pride. We are often interested in what is at the end of the journey rather than the journey itself, we cannot wait to get there but you have to isolated, your are on your honeymoon with your beloved. He needs to snap the ties of Egypt and the lust for the blessings of the Promised Land, that you will be dependent upon Him and only Him. He leads us out that we might be led-in once more; He finds what is in our heart so that we would know Him in our heart, and there the convenant is made from one heart to the other, so that we are not just sons by blood but sons in actuality. God is becoming our Father in a way we have never seen before. It would not be enough for one circumstance to expose out heart; the human soul is equipped enough to survive one night trudging through the desert and the Red Sea; one event in public with drama does not make a man and does not expose a man to God. Years of battering and daily weathering only denudes our pride until we come to the end of our tether; 40 years in the desert will do this; daily drudgery in the small things of life is where a disciple is born. Faithfulness and joy in obscurity because you are with Him are what really sustains you. Then you are led by the hand out of the wilderness by the one you truly love (Psa 77:20).

(Based upon, in part, on Oswald Chambers "My Utmost for His Highest", 21st October, Direction by Impulse)